smiles

dear anyone,

have u ever smile, not like you mean it, not like you have to? have u ever smile so blossomly just to make sure people dont hate you? have you ever smile so wide, just just because youre happy? well, if anyone could notice, wht is the meaning of all smile. im guessing tht my smile will have no meaning at all. im not a let go person, im keeping things in my heart. no matter how i hate a person, and no matter how sad i am, not matter how happy i am. i didnt even plan on writing this here. but i just need a new entry ;p but no matter what, i do smile so happy when i let everything out. its just not tht easy for me, to just tell wht im feeling inside. i dont want to be the one whose depending, i want people to always depend on me. i cant have a problem if i want to do tht, so i hide. behind smiles that im faking. behind all of it, people wouldnt notice me.
after all, i admit it really hurts. especially when it was kept like 20 yrs ago, or maybe 12 years ago. feels like having a bleeding heart for that. but im no longer tht now, im smiling honestly and i have a meaning for all my smiles. just because i dont want to be someone who has no problems, because problems are made to gained experiences. and so i thanked people tht im relying on. for hearing me problems, no matter how stupid its going to be. thanks ! okay then, i'll just leave to you to think about it.

blossom smiles with meaning,

shierasharif

i am staying.

i watched this episode of "ape ape aje". topics regarding first date and right on my mind i terigt our first date.
igt tak kte makan ape? ahahah. we ate bread history. that was the most lame lunch i ever ate. you tau i kuat makan en? how on earth kte leh makan roti je. mane cukup perut aku lahap bende tu je?
and yeah,

remember kte buat ape mase our first date? kte bowling en? ahahahaha. i beaten you dude !
i managed to strikes THREE times in a row. hehehe. u remember, darling?

and we were like, malu abis antara satu sama lain ! weehuuu. and i rse mcam thts us mase awal2 ! were so FAKE ! aahaha. and now,
see what happen to you ?

peeps !

yo peeps around the world,
i am now writing my own fiction.
it is called kisah maimunah and mustapha, it is however focusing on a journey about both of them lives. it is so called "bajet interesting"
it just happen to be my new hobbies.
updating that fiction.
do check it out at :

http://maimunahmustapha.blogspot.com

i could say what i wanted to.

jari jemari ku longlai,
aku lemah atau aku tidak dapat mengawal?
bisikan jahat di telinga,
bisikan sinis ke hati,
hendak diikutkan, pasti aku kan merana,
hendak dialahkan, pasti aku tidak mampu,
aku tidak mampu mendenyutkan kembali semangat yang pudar ini,
atau aku mampu tetapi aku tidak mahu?
aku cari jawapannya, tapi seperti tiada petandanya,
kenapa aku lemah?
kenapa tidak bisa aku melawan?
kenapa tidak bisa aku bangkit?
mungkin,
kerana aku cuma manusia,
kerana aku cuma kerdil,
tidak mampu melawan?

tetapi ternyata aku silap,

apa tidak bisa sang semut membina rumah?
apa tidak bisa sang bintang berkelip?
bintang kan lebih kecil dari bulan,

jadi, biarlah aku terus menyelami,
lautan yang dipenuhi jawapan,
apa perlu kulakukan untuk,
bersinar seperti bintang.



p/s : cubaan kedua, trying to express it in real deep words :D

tension released :)

30th april 2009.
i went watching movie with my chicks, yani and skyna.
"he's just not that into you"
i could say, tht movie can beat most of the movie that related to love.
in that movie, to be noticed, u doesnt need a hot, perfect someone to actually fill your heart.
it somehow destiny that makes you and that right person together.
"behind all the rules, theres an exception"
i could die by being too overwhelmed with the movie.

THE BEST I EVER WATCHED!

Somewhere only we know - Keane.

I walked across, an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth, beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete

Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when, you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin.

I came across, a fallen elm tree, I felt the branches;
are they looking at me?
Is this the place, we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?
Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when, you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
So if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go,
somewhere only we know
Somewhere only we know.